Bill Simmons has never heard of jokes.
From his most recent column (which I’m still reading, but had to stop and present this little nugget):
Q: Don’t feel too comfortable with the Moss Era. Remember, in ‘05, Moss’s first game for the Raiders, he blew past your boys, too. Moss is (a) as brittle as an 80-year-old women with osteoperosis, (2) as moody as a 50-year-old woman in menopause and (d) as devoted as a Christina Ricci’s character in “Black Snake Moan.” So he encompasses all ages of womanhood. Brady might be a “leader”, but so was Cris Carter, Art Shell, Warren Sapp, etc., and they couldn’t keep him in check. Prediction: Moss will be on IR by Week 8, and you guys will still compete with Brady throwing to your shady sideline camera men as receivers. And the country will still hate all-things annoying and Boston.
– Nema, San FranSG: Believe me, I will never be comfortable with Moss. My guard couldn’t be more up. By the way, I loved the fact that Nema used “a,” “2″ and “d” as the headers for his three reasons. Nobody ever said my readers were brain surgeons.
Yikes. I know the man loves his 80’s something fierce, but they had invented non-sequitur humor by then, right? Buzz broke that joke out hardcore in Home Alone. Something tells me he’d be less quick to jump on an obvious joke if the letter-writer didn’t rightfully hate all things Boston. But such is sports.
